Trump Prefers Two State Solution. Or one. Or Two

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During his meeting with Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, President Trump spoke of the decades long Middle East dispute that has bedeviled so many US presidencies, and his off-the-cuff answer to the problem.

“I am a big fan of the two state solution, said Trump, but I also would be happy with a one state solution. Sort of like we have here in America with the blacks and whites, in places like Alabama and Mississippi. I remember President Jim Crow saying that so long as public facilities were equal for blacks and whites, they could be kept separate. And the so-called judges on the Supreme Court agreed. They called it the Equal Rights Amendment and people tell me we still have it today.”

Taking the stunned silence from the assembled crowd in the White House Rose Garden as rapt attention, the president continued.

“What I want ….. what America wants …. is for the Irish and the Palestinians to just get along, okay? That would be really terrific. I could build a hotel in downtown Jerusalem that would have separate floors. Some for the Irish, some for the Palestinians. Then they could all do lunch together before going out to the Whaling Wall, to see the migration of the whales in the Dead Sea. President Ben Yahoo and I could make a deal on the food concessions, right Ben? I don’t know what Palestinians eat, but I know a lot about the Irish Jews. I know more about the Irish Jews than Saint Patrick. He’s still a Catholic, right? But he’ll come around to the Jew thing so fast it will make your head spin. Trust me.”

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